For Sale -- One Genuine Dragon's Fang.
Now, I know you're thinking that this must be something I made... but it's not. Did you really think that it was knights in shining armor that laid low all those pesky dragons?
No, my friends, that's just more fake news. Blacksmiths have been the go-to guy for all manner of monster eradication needs. Unfortunately, those damnable knights had the money to burn and the minstrels sure weren't going to bite the hand that feeds them.
Fake News isn't new!
If you think about it logically, why would you ride off to the nearest castle and hope there was a knight handy.... when your village undoubtedly had a blacksmith. Aren't blacksmiths already a grouchy and curmudgeonly lot? Aren't we already used to dealing with irate animals, shodding horses and oxen from sun up to sun down? Dragon's fire? Ha! Try standing in front of the forge all day long during a hot summer in South Carolina!!
No, my friends, don't believe the lies. If you have a dragon bothering your herds, eating up all your young lasses, call on the blacksmith. If you wait for some hoity-toity in a shiny tin suit to come riding to your rescue... you're gonna be waiting a long time!
This Fang is a trophy from my latest hunt. Though I'm prohibited from saying where it was, protecting anonymity and all that (I'm sure you understand), I can tell you it was a whopper of a beast. Fully 40 feet from tip to tail, and it smelled truly awful!
While I don't make these trophies available often, this being only the fifth in existence, sometimes needs must.
As you can see in the pictures, even bringing the Fang to a red heat isn't enough to get off all the burnt on Knight and Gnome. Dragons are notoriously bad about dental hygiene, as you might imagine, but I do my best to make them presentable. At the very least, you won't have to worry about the incredible stink these things usually have.
If you're a dragon aficionado or know someone who is, this is a one-in-a-lifetime opportunity. While there are a lot of fakes out there, carved from wood or plastic, I promise this is most definitely chipped out of a chunk of deer antler or painted polymer. This is the Genuine Article. Promise!
Yours for $250 delivered anywhere in the continental US!
A treasure you can pass down through the generations.
If you're interested, send me a PM and we'll work out the details. Paypal is open and waiting!
Thank you for your time!